There are different flavors of Narcissism. Narcissists present themselves differently. For example, some are overt, some are covert, and some are a mix of both. Although outwardly they may manifest differently, their foundation is the same, and they battle with a lot of the same insecurities.
So today, I want to talk about some uncommon signs of Narcissism, which will put the spotlight on what some call Vulnerable Narcissism.
So some people have a general idea of how a Narcissist may present themselves. Social Media has provided us with some very good examples of Narcissistic behavior, such as being quite grandiose. Where they think quite highly of themselves and make a point of appearing confident, successful, being quite a social butterfly, even acting cocky or proud. But that is just one take and not entirely true of all Narcissists. Because even though all Narcissists feel this way of being filled with pride and thinking themselves to be better than others, some do not show it. And that takes us to our first uncommon sign of Narcissism:
Because the truth is that not all Narcissists are extroverts. There are Narcissists who are introverted and may seem disinterested in being in the spotlight. But they still do crave recognition and attention; they just won’t say it and they won’t make it obvious. Only the people close to them will come to realize their competitive and envious nature and how much it bothers them when others are promoted or chosen over them. So, because someone is introverted, it does not mean they are not a Narcissist. Introverts can be Narcissists.
Recommended Book: How To Kill A Narcissist: Debunking The Myth Of Narcissism And Recovering From Narcissistic Abuse (A Guide To Narcissistic Abuse Recovery And Healing From A Narcissistic Relationship)
Another uncommon sign of Narcissism has to do with the issue of Narcissists being takers rather than givers. In general, we know Narcissists would take and take until there is nothing left to be taken. But this can be displayed in a way where the Narcissist refuses to spend money even on themselves. So instead of having that flashy image, they play it down. So, although they can afford to rent their apartment or pay their bills, they would prefer to sleep on a friend’s couch or live in the grandparents’ basement and not contribute a penny. They would want to eat and come and go as they please without taking on any responsibility. They would prefer to give the impression that they don’t have something so that others can give to them.
By doing this, they avoid helping or giving to others and instead be the one who is constantly in need and taking whatever they can get. This is also a way for them to cheat people out of their hard-earned money when they themselves don’t really need it. Their aim is to go through life constantly having others foot the bill. Narcissists are users, and some of them have no issue playing broke or acting worse off if it means they can take advantage of you.
Another uncommon sign of narcissism is Self-Victimization where the Narcissist sets themself up for failure. Yes, we know Narcissists love to play the victim when it suits them, but there are some that do it all the time. This would be where the Narcissist seems to purposefully self-sabotage their own lives to gain sympathy. Some love to play the pity card all their lives to gain attention, money, and more. Whether they use a disability, illness, or some other misfortune, they will milk it for what it’s worth. Narcissists have no problem presenting themselves as weak or unfortunate if it benefits them to do so.
The final uncommon sign of Narcissism I want to get into is self-deprecation, which is a combination of being excessively modest and overly critical of oneself. So, they would actively try to belittle or undervalue themselves and what they do. But this is a tactic Narcissists use to get compliments and praise. Self-deprecation is a way to fish for compliments while feigning modesty. Narcissists love attention, recognition, and praise. And if they realize by putting themselves down, other people will lift them up, and some of them are happy to take that route in order to get their Narcissistic Supply.
Read More: 8 Ways To Spot a Lying Narcissist.
But to conclude, what we can tell from this list is that not all Narcissists are about appearing successful, strong, attractive, and confident. Because at the end of the day, not all of them have been dealt the same cards and have to find other ways to manipulate, control, and get their Narcissistic Supply. So, some who have not been blessed with beauty or personal success have resorted to self-victimization or self-deprecation.
Recommended Book: Becoming the Narcissist’s Nightmare: How to Devalue and Discard the Narcissist While Supplying Yourself- By Shahida Arabi.
Then there are the Introverted Narcissists who are able to really slide under the radar and appear harmless due to their quiet, reserved nature. But basically, all I am trying to say is that if someone appears toxic on the one hand but introverted or low in self-worth on the other, it doesn’t mean they are not a threat. It does not mean they are not Narcissistic.
Related: 14 Traits of The Nice Guy Narcissist.
Not all Narcissists are openly grandiose, proud, and full of themselves. But at the end of the day, they are all controlling, manipulative, selfish, pathological liars. And they are looking to take advantage and hurt whoever they can.
Ok, that is it for this article. I hope it was useful. Share your thoughts if you’ve come across a Narcissist like I’ve described today. And as always, many thanks for reading.
Read More: 10 Problems Only Narcissists Have.
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