Number 1: Simulating Your Death – A Narcissist’s Sick Fantasy.
They simulate your death to see how they feel about you. Yes, you heard me right. When no one is around, some narcissists go to a strange mental place. One of the easiest things they do is mentally simulate your death. Of course, not because they love you, not because they would miss you, or they are exploring some worst-case scenario. They are checking something. They want to see if they would feel anything at all. Would they feel free? Would they be able to move on and finally be happy? Would they enjoy the power they would have in the situation? Or would they enjoy the people’s sympathy for being the grieving one? Or would they feel rage because, even in death, you would still have more attention than them? They might even cry. But please don’t mistake it for grief; it is self-pity. The tears are for the narcissist left behind, not for the person who is gone.
In this sick rehearsal, they imagine people flocking to them, consoling them, or praising their strength, or not finding out who did the deed. They create imaginary conversations and funeral speeches where they still control the narrative. This fake death gives them a chance to test drive your absence while fantasizing about how to rewrite your story in their favor. It’s, of course, not love; as I said, it’s rehearsal—a sick secret ritual where your humanity is reduced to a prop for fantasy. This is how they murder you in their imagination when they cannot do it in reality.
And understand, when a narcissist does this, when a point comes in a relationship where a narcissist starts thinking about this stuff, either it is becoming really dangerous, or you have given them a narcissistic injury big enough that they feel totally powerless before you.
Recommended Book: Becoming the Narcissist’s Nightmare: How to Devalue and Discard the Narcissist While Supplying Yourself- By Shahida Arabi.
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